Super Stupid Mario Commercials
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: Mario, Toadette, Dry Bowser, Petey Piranha, and all the stupid denizens of the Mushroom Kingdom attempt to do commercials.
1. Chapter 1

"Commercials?" Dry Bowser remarked in disgust as he read a script. "I think it's clear that Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus ran out of ideas-"

Toadette farted a big bassy fart as she chucked several pieces of paper into the air. "Who cares? We're gonna be in commercials!"

"Read this story!" Petey Piranha said as he barfed up brown goop, causing Dry Bowser and Toadette to look at him oddly. The mutated piranha plant shrugged in response. "What? This kind of counts as a commercial."

"He's got a point." Arceus stated as he and Gruntilda Winkybunion were both making their very brief cameos, y'know IN THE STORY.

"This stupid crossover is degrading as fuck," Gruntilda rhymed as she placed her right warty hand on her witchy face, sighing. "This whole premise makes me want to chuck."

* * *

"Hey kids!" Toadette exclaimed as she popped up in front of a white background. "Wanna be cute like me? Then get a SNICKERS car!"

Just then Toadette farted out a SNICKERS chocolate candy bar as she ate it up, with Dry Bowser popping up.

"SNICKERS, you're not you when you're hungry." Dry Bowser pointed out as Toadette burped loudly.

* * *

"BUY MY GAMES!" Mario exclaimed as he chucked several of his various games into the air. "They're generic platformers with no unique aspects!"

"And they have no story value, either!" King Bowser exclaimed as he kidnapped Princess Peach Toadstool yet again.

"Only $59.99, plus tax!" Peach exclaimed as she felt her crown fall off.

* * *

"Come to my taco stand!" Waluigi exclaimed as he was at his taco stand in Seaside Hill, flailing his arms. "And while you're at it, try out my Bridal Boutique and my Motor Oil company! And race on my pinball and stadium race courses! WAH!"

"And I thought I showed off too much..." Bowser Junior muttered to the camera as he just shook his head.

* * *

"I got a bunch of coconuts... and I ain't gonna share 'em!" Luigi remarked as he was high in the sky at the Cloudtop Cruise

"You better come down!" Donkey Kong exclaimed as he pulled out his Coconut Gun. "Cuz this thing fires in spurts! And when it shoots ya, it's gonna hurt!"

Luigi stuck his tongue out, so Donkey Kong fired coconuts at Luigi, killing the green capped plumber.

"DK's Coconut Gun! Get it now!" Princess Daisy exclaimed as she waved her arms in the air like she just didn't care.

* * *

"You know what would go well with these french fries?" Petey Piranha exclaimed as he turned to Toadsworth.

"No, what?" Toadsworth asked as he folded his arms together.

"MCDONALD'S!" Petey exclaimed as hamburgers and chicken sandwiches began dancing with him.

"...I'm not sure if I'm loving it." Toadsworth remarked as he was then buried in chicken nuggets.

"McDonald's, part of this complete... feast!" Toad blurted out as several Toads popped up all around a random McDonald's.


	2. Chapter 3

"Want to try your luck?" Dry Bowser stated while in front of a giant Roulette wheel. "Then come test your might at the Casino Park! We got all the free spaces for money!"

"WAHAHAHA! I love this place!" Wario exclaimed as he took a huge dive into the giant pile of golden coins, making the most of his time at the Casino Park as he was then swamped by yellow rings, green dollar bills, and smaller silver coins.

"I guess Wario payed for that," Sonic The Hedgehog joked as he and Dry Bowser laughed, with a canned laugh track playing in the background.

* * *

Toadette was whistling as she was cleaning a bunch of ribbons at the Ribbon Road, when Birdo pulled up in her ribbon covered Birthday Girl car.

"Hey Toadette! You like this?" Birdo remarked as she rubbed the vehicle.

"Ooh, I just love it!" Toadette exclaimed as she rubbed her hands on the car.

This then caused the car to explode into ribbons, as a birthday party was now going on, with Birdo and Toadette holding each other in their arms as they began kissing.

 _Birthday Car, it makes random days into birthdays!_

* * *

Petey Piranha was diving in and out of the sea as he was near the Sunshine Airport, seeing various planes crash into each other.

"Wow... and that's why I don't fly on planes!" Petey exclaimed as he laughed, grabbing a nearby bunch of seaweed and flying high into the sky as he spun around, moving his big green leaves about as he used them like wings.


	3. Chapter 2

"You know what would go good with this golf club?" petey Piranha stated as he pulled out some frisbees. "Frisbees! Now you can golf with frisbees like you always wanted when you were a kid!"

"That does not make sense!" Professor E. Gadd exclaimed while flailing his arms. "And I know a lot about not making sense!"

Petey then swung a frisbee into E. Gadd's face, with it knocking the old man into the river, since they were on a grassy golf course.

* * *

"Why am I here again?" Wario remarked quite bored while scratching his butt, being in his garage.

"You're recording your new microgames," A Lakitu told Wario.

"Oh yeah." Wario remarked as he held out several small cartridges. "New and improved! WarioWare: Micro MICRO games! So short and brief, they're not even games!"

"So would blinking be a micro 'micro' game?" Toadette asked as she blinked a few times.

"Yes!" Wario laughed as he shook his big fat butt. "So give me your money now! WAH!"

"...what a ripoff." Dry Bowser remarked as he lowered his newspaper. "I guess this dumb commercial was a micro 'micro' game."

Wario then attacked Dry Bowser out of rage.


End file.
